An orphan drifts through interstellar space
mountains rising on a world without days
exposed to dark imagination’s grace
blanketed in an atmospheric haze
light years from the last kiss of her lodestar
whispering ice gods keep the planet bound,
flick-lit by a giant passing pulsar,
its steady signal yearning to be found
archandroid presages a mystagogue
bearing a book of tales most luminous,
an Interior Castle analogue,
detailing a communion numinous
forgotten promises written in code
as her self-repairing circuits corrode
My first sonnet, posted for Gay’s excellent prompt: http://dversepoets.com/2012/09/13/formforall-basic-sonnet-forms/
Chromapoetica 
love the combo of myth and science here…great images…her self-repairing circuits corroding…light years from the last kiss of her lodestar…and your first sonnet – really? wow…kudos anna
Thanks Claudia, this is my first foray and I found this idea for the poem a couple of days ago but couldn’t bring it to life until after I read Gay’s prompt. I love it when that happens. Your encouragement keeps me smiling through the trials and that is a wonderful gift :).
This feels wonderful on my tongue.. you make the rhythms spring off the page. I love what you do with science, Anna… one beautiful sonnet here.
Becky, I am so happy to hear this worked for you. The first attempt always feels vulnerable to me so your kind words have soothed my nervous concerns.
Nice mix of science and myth which give it resonance and read aloud it works really well
Thank you John, I wanted to evoke a sci-fi/mythic atmosphere.
This is compelling stuff! I love the flick-lighting from the pulsar. You had me hooked all through.
Compelling and hooked are music to my ears, thank you!
dang you make it dance ma’am…and the science and myth mix gives this some really cool depth as well…..even get great feeling in it with your closure…nice…
Brian, I’m so relieved. I actually had nightmares about some new strict four line poem form and spent the night in revisions! Though it’s likely the stress of yesterday got thrown in the mix, exacerbating the anxiety, still. . . I really appreciate your feedback!
Congrats – and great and interesting subject. k.
Thanks k, I look forward to yours!
You are always so brave in your choice of subject matter – it is inventive and interesting. k.
I found the form forced me to restrict where this poem would have spun out in free verse, likely incorporating too many metaphors and ideas. It’s fascinating when form cradles the subject to allow it to become more fully realized. Thank you very much for ‘brave’, it made my day :)!
A short Anna poem with short lines: a new world and interesting!
I Enjoy the words that make your rhyme and imaginary place in space: loadstar, pulsar, luminous, numinous, mystagogue, analogue. This is why I like a good sonnet now and then as it forces a formal creativity. And here these help the flow. For a minute I thought this was a clever interaction with a cigarette–“flick-lit by a giant passing pulsar,
its steady signal yearning to be found” (I quit awhile ago, but some words are triggers to happy memories” But I let go of it, realizing that I care for this orphan droid and wished her maintenance was not corroding so I could get at the stories and hear about her last kiss.
Ha, the cigarette connection is one I’d never have made – with asthma I’ve not even been tempted to smoke. It’s wonderful to see how it arrived in your mind and to hear you cared for her and wanted to know her stories. Lovely to see you!
wow, well, you pulled off this first sonnet like a pro! i love all of it, but that last line is just super-fabulous… i think i need some self-repairing circuits.
Kelly, your continual kindness is a joy in my life. I would also enjoy some self-repairing circuits :)!
put me in mind of the tears of rain soliloquy.
awesomeness
both 😀
I saw Blade Runner twice (but a long time ago) so I have to admit to looking up that reference, and then it came flooding back . . . ‘all those moments will be lost in time’.
Wow – it’s hard to talk about form to you when you have written such a layered, magnificent poem. (And really that is what must dominate – regardless of structure). You did the very thing with the idea of sonnet it was meant to do, let the control of line length, rhyme and poem length circumscribe your subject and in so doing the mystery, myth, and dazzling subject leaps off the page, rotates around our head, sings a celestial song, and pulls us into the unheard and unknown stories.
But ehhhrrr…as I’m meant to discuss the details of the form..I will say this: Clearly Shakespearean, also rhyme scheme perfect, each quatrain and the couplet fulfilling the desired requirements – the summation surprising (thus everyone wanting a fix for the corrosion). The meter isn’t regular, of course. With these choice of words it would be difficult if not impossible to make it evenly iambic. A goal to be strived for in later sonnets perhaps.
Still that doesn’t in anyway hinder this from being a great sonnet, Anna!
Gay, I agree it is something to strive for as I tend to get too attached to my word choices and refuse to budge, even when trying very much to stick to form. I was not a rebellious child so I can’t understand this form resistance :). I credit you completely for giving me the willingness to try and for the birth of this poem which refused to germinate as free verse. As ever, I deeply appreciate your instruction, encouragement, and kindness!
Super combination! I’m still learning form, but it seems right for such a pairing to use a freer meter. The “Interior Castle” puzzles me, but that’s a familiar state.
Interior Castle is a book written by the Spanish mystic Teresa of Avila in 1577. Very nice to meet you!
this is a bright, thought propelling sonnet. I found it easy to roll off my tongue as I read it aloud for fun. science, myth, and metaphor…divine. ~light years from the last kiss of her lodestar~ love!
Jane :)! Your visits always brighten my day! Thanks so much.
Science, exploration, mythology — with the impossible — nice!
Thank you, nice to meet you!
Wonderful. It is hard to believe this is your first. My first is buried away out of sight 😀
Thank you Beth, that’s a beautiful compliment. I’m sure I will want to hide this one when I write a second or tenth :D.
This is so interesting. I too did my first sonnet after Gay posted the form, although linked in the 1st time post 🙂
You have done very well. Not many would dare to what you have woven so artistically…
“forgotten promises written in code
as her self-repairing circuits corrode”
what a poignant conclusion…
Many hugs xoxoxo
Thank you Olivia, it’s very nice to see you here from Facebook and dVerse. I look forward to reading your sonnet :D.
i feel the vastness of this universe
spacetime beyond comprehension
stark journey for the planet. for the archandroid
i hope there is life on another planet
the miracle of ecology a celebration
of the perfect dance of a galaxy.
celestial family.
Me too, how beautifully you capture this hope!
someone had this bit of blake as a sig and it reminded me of this
To see a world in a grain of sand,
And a heaven in a wild flower,
Hold infinity in the palm of your hand,
And eternity in an hour.
Yes, that’s perfect, thank you for sharing it.