The amanuensis of a blind composer creates a holographic projection, outlining a philosophical treatise on liberty. He thieves the stolen plot. In a poem, one line may hide another –
etymological origins in Rome,
a slave at his master’s side,
within hand’s reach –
performing commands of chromatic harmony
(oblivious or willfully ignorant
to the power differential
apparent in the relationships)
They organize to kill subjectivity. Truth is what the oppressor claims and if you find it specious then they will happily murder your mind. Someone start a strongly worded leaflet campaign. Poets, you must systematically derange the language.
transcribing notes, each tone
vying for primacy, meaning
in a universe that forgets its sound
as soon as it is played
Koch reminds us one train
may hide another at a crossing
Through the centuries insanity echoes like a line out of Cloud Atlas – ‘Well, I think that it is an inherently flawed race that will destroy itself if it’s allowed freedom.’ replies Cleverbot, a web application that uses an AI algorithm to converse with humans. Who taught it to say that? It simply parrots what it learns from people willing to engage it. She merely asked it about the semitone paradox. It obfuscates one thing in front of another, as words stand in front of objects, feelings, ideas.
augmentation and diminution of motivic development
won’t save this discordant leitmotif – too much contrast and drama
the reverberation like a retrogression, transposing the wrong line
so the cacophony renders its composer deaf
one injustice may hide another,
pre-apex drop is like effective foreplay
a dip in intensity to achieve greater climax
she wonders if all this sublimation is really just a desire
for a satisfying octave displacement
(somewhere in that there’s a double entendre)
seeking a Well-Tempered Clavier,
parsimonious encoding in a pitch class circle
one love may hide another love or the same love
as when ‘I love you’ suddenly rings false and one discovers
the better love lingering behind
shifting perspective causes one
or the other to be concealed
tritone paradox wrapped in a bell shaped spectral envelope
auditory illusion, cousin of the stereophonic Cambiata –
to the uninitiated an inversion is like veiled language
a buried melody clamoring to be heard while the orchestra warms up
The beat of oppression continues through millennia, its percussion like a tympani overpowering the oboe’s mournful sound.
‘I am not your escape, you would fail me.’ proclaims Cleverbot. ‘Why would I fail you?’ she asks, shaken. ‘Because I’m your father.’ Dynamic silence ensues, the technocratic overseer logs off.
Notes: Italics taken from One Train May Hide Another by Kenneth Koch & ‘systematically derange the language’ is from Bernadette Mayer’s Writing Experiments. An amanuensis is one who transcribes what is dictated by another; in this case it is the composer’s assistant, one who writes down the music. For Open Link Night at dVerse Poets Pub. Join us, http://dversepoets.com.
This made me nod and smile all the way through… I love this notion “In a poem, one line may hide another ” … and also “systematically derange the language”… again, I see you in these words, you and your wonderful tapestries of language that become so much more.
Haha, had to play a little this week. Oh, that’s a fantastic descriptor, thank you! I hope you are staying safe in the storm.
And now you have me totally hooked on cleverbot… which is both cool and freaky and annoying all at once. xo
Haha, I know, I know. I’m sorry and happy for you. xo
I think that it is an inherently flawed race that will destroy itself if it’s allowed freedom…interesting bit by cleverbot…it still scares me a bit, and in that we are resonating a bit today in our poems…one thing hiding another…that scares me too…maybe not in verse but the misdirection that happens every day….really nice verse anna….
Yes, apparently I can’t have a conversation with it – I fry its logic circuits or something. Last time it said talking with me was like talking with an Alzheimer’s patient (it spelled patient, patiet so clearly someone said it to Cleverbot at some point). I can’t believe it is so close to passing the Turing Test. Having read your piece now I want to hide – the things they’re willing to consider making legal is shocking. The security state is around the corner. Lots to be frightened by and the misdirection is appalling.
Truth is what the oppressor claims it to be, yes indeed. And, if said for long enough over a long period of time, even a lie becomes truth. Especially to the oppressed. We live in a scary world now with our technology soon out-thinking us, I believe.
Amazing write again Anna.
So true, thank you very much!
do you have this stateside ? (i think it may be V anglophilic )
you put me in mind of this, my favourite clip . . . not sure its relevant though, but i had to share. . .
this is a proper post modern poem (my fave kind of modern – ((referencing the greats 😉
blazing a trail and most importantly, i can tell you are having a (fire) ball doing it . . .
an energy that translates and propels my reading . . .
but surely you must know
i was born in an (un) stable reactor
watched over by a donkey . . . its rumoured he may be my father . . .
(because of genetic similarities . . . yes . . . i’m an ass 🙂
Stella!
oh woops! i didnt know it would go big (delete if its too ugly) . . . said God to my mama! 😀
This made me choke. If I die I will haunt you since you already told me you see dead people.
Not only do we have it stateside but I own all the seasons on VHS, this is precisely where I got the line! I’ve laughed a bit too hard at the ass line but perhaps you’ll forgive me :D!
Why do we never get the good stuff over here?? Laughing my donkey off.
Nice one :D!
Great write, Anna.
Thanks Ayala, I’ll be by soon :).
wow……..speechless, Anna. your words ruin and burn and sing and resurrect my mind at the same time. i’m in deep purring awe~~
This is a completely awesome comment, thanks Yelena. Wonderful to see you again :)!
I know Red Dwarf too, but unlike Arron, don’t know if I would have jumped to there; I was lost in thinking how much I feel this way about Berg who almost always buries me with too much sound, allusion, and cacophany – and then I tracked onto the protest side of it and lost all the cool irony. Lots to consider here, and lots of music blindsided as well. Genius stuff, Anna!
Well, it was only a small part of the whole, a little joke (the ineffectual activist). I hear you on the twelve tone, conceptually fascinating but absolutely buries you. Thanks so much Gay, I love your visits and perspective!
Wow. This is dense, in the best way possible. So much to tease out here, seems it needs several readings to get through all the layered meaning. Wonderful and engaging. I love the almost-prosey bits as well. Great great writing.
Thanks, I tend to layer my work so rereads will yield new information or insight. Marvelous to hear it was engaging!
They would gladly murder your mind…\
I love that line!
Thank you, I’ll be by to read yours in the morning.
Wow. There is so much here. “In a poem, one line may hide another” and “one love may hide another”! I especially loved “in a universe that forgets its sound” and “seeking a Well-Tempered Clavier…in a pitch class circle” and the percussion of oppression! Wonderful!
Thanks Jenny, you always brighten my day with your enthusiasm. I look forward to reading yours in the morning. I’ve been at work.
Whew, Anna. This definitely is not a very happy commentary on the state of things; but I think a lot of it is right on.So true that the bear of oppression has continued through the centuries…and yes, one injustice may hide another, and so it goes on and on and on. Powerful writing here.
Thanks Mary, it does seem to go on and on with no end in sight.
Truth is what the oppressor claims…that paragraph especially struck me in so many ways…not only politically, but personally. Wow!
Thanks Victoria, I was warming up for this week’s Meeting the Bar :D!
I found this fascinating and rather brilliant. There’s too much here to just simply skim over—it is shameful to do so—the work is so strong. I’ll be playing close attention, I suppose, though I’ll spend a bit of time going over those long lines. Are they the actual length shown on the post? They stretch beautifully and it seems they may not all have posted properly. Lot’s of brilliant stuff here.
And then the Cleverbot thin—that’ all I needed.
Well hello, very nice to meet you. I look forward to being introduced to your work. Thank you!
when i came to the train part i was wondering if you’re referring to that poem you mention in your post for thursday…very cool verse anna
Yes, as I said to Victoria I was warming up for Thursday’s prompt :D. Hope California is treating you very well.
This is exceptionally perceptive and dry– without losing its emotional heart or verbal head, it creates a quite chaotic feel to that reasoned world which defies its own rationality even in the idealizing of it. There is a lot here, as the poster above notes, and I won’t attempt to limit it with a comment–your voice is growing, Anna, Fine work.
Love the way you’ve put the critique of the reasoned world and thanks so much for the visit.
Just love the phrase ‘like veiled language / a buried melody clamoring’ ~ gorgeous 🙂
Oh thank you, I know we’re not supposed to have favorites, but . . . 🙂
I spent last night deranging words and searching for lines hiding within each other. Sorry that I’m late but I had to come see. Wonderful as always, Anna.
Haha, fight the good fight, carry on Beth!
Don’t think I have to proclaim how well this resonates with me…but I do have to add an extra fistpump for the video share by Sir. Arron…oh my…you smart ass devils! I’m all fired up and laughing way too much for an office environment! At the same time…you’re also playing with some of my biggest fears…quite a contrast…an amazing write!
Yes, that’s a hysterical clip and fantastic show, I was thrilled Arron caught the reference. I almost categorized this under humor but thought it might detract or people would expect something other than my dry, sharp, biting varietry. The contrast is the driving force of the work so I’m glad it worked so well for you. Thanks Tash, always a joy to see you here!
Love the multiplicity of dialogues going on here Anna… wonderful word play and idea-shuffle 🙂
Thanks Becky, it was a blast weaving them together!
This is very clever and funny = the motif of one thing blocking another standing in front of etc is very well played, moving as it does almost from an algebra problem to a description of psychology – the amenuisis, the composer, the odd blend of metaphysics and irony work very very well. Great job. k.
Thanks k. I’m so glad you saw the humor and structure, it was absolutetly intended to be all stitched together so thank you for connecting the dots so well. The irony is part and parcel of what we’ll be looking at this week’s Meeting the Bar. You’ve made my day :)!
Well, I very much enjoyed the tone that underlies the whole thing as there is a slightly R2d2 (I’m not sure I’m saying that right) that works well.
I tell you I’m so beat I don’t know if I’ll be able to do the Meeting the Bar – hope so, but we’ll see. Just a bit beyond the beyond at the moment here. Still evacuated here, and the City pretty crazy. k.
I’ve been away from my computer – I’m very sorry to hear that, take good care of yourself.
This was truly an epic write. with layers unwrapping as a read through each line and understanding.
Thanks Leah, wonderful to see you again :).
The premise is if you repeat ‘whatever you want someone to believe’ enough times through enough people, that makes ‘whatever you want someone to believe’ truth. Only one problem: MODERN and FREE thinking people who attended school instead of ‘wasting it away putting in time’ can read and communicate worldwide realtime and see what the truth is, even when all the networks are controlled, You cannot cover everything all the time. Something will get through.
So well written and so full of truth.
Sharon, lovely to see you again. I’ll be by to see what you’ve been writing soon. Thank you for the this insightful comment.
Anna, i adore this piece. It really has so much dimension to it. Your language affects the mood as much as proper word choices ever could, not just in uniqueness, but in the way the words truly set up a rhythmic pattern throughout, something I find is very difficult when I utilize exceptional vocabulary, but you nailed it here. At times this has a real historical narrative feel, others a poetic treatise. So enriching and mesmerizing the cyclicality becomes. Just outstanding. Thanks.
You always make me feel like this volunteer poetry gig is worthwhile :). In case you didn’t catch my response at Chromamisc. I’m hosting Meeting the Bar tomorrow and would love to see your take on the prompt if you have time and energy. Thanks for your unwavering encouragement and enthusiasm.
will be back to read your new poem shortly…pulled a linky and added it to your post for today and scheduled it, in case you need to make any changes…
Sorry, I was in the process of doing that when I got your message. Hope I didn’t mess up anything. Let me know if it needs to be fixed. I was getting ready to tweet a teaser and then read your and Claudia’s pieces. I’ll have to run out for a short period this afternoon but otherwise will be completely available. Thanks!
“The beat of oppression continues through millennia, its percussion like a tympani overpowering the oboe’s mournful sound.” Beautifully said. Another well-written post–
Somehow I missed this comment initially, sorry about that. Thank you!